Police, Church warn against hasty marriages

Kerala´s police and Catholic bishops are urging people to take greater care when marrying fellow Indians who are working overseas.

A Catholic marriage ceremony underway in Kerala, southern India. The bride and groom together light a lamp to symbolize their union

Both the Church and police say many hasty marriages with people working overseas end in divorce and they often lead to cases of fraud when the backgrounds of partners are not properly checked. There have also been cases where partners are already married.

Most marriages are arranged through the family or marriage bureaus.

People realize the situation only after the marriage, said state police chief Jacob Punnoose. His department has issued guidelines for marriage with non-resident Indians (NRI) including how to make proper inquiries about marriage partners.

Punnoose, a Catholic, said his department wants to provide “a helping hand” to the public and check crimes related to hasty NRI marriages.

The police guidelines issued on Dec. 14 came two days after the Kerala Catholic Bishops´ Council (KCBC) announced a policy on conducting marriages of Catholics working overseas.

KCBC spokesperson Father Stephen Alathara says the Church had noticed in recent years a large number of marriages of Indians working abroad ending in divorce. The KCBC drafted a set of guidelines for NRI marriages applicable to Catholics of all three Church rites — the Latin, Syro-Malabar and Syro-Malankara rites — in the state.

The guidelines urge parents to check the visa status and salaries of their children´s prospective partners and familiarize themselves with immigration rules of the various countries. They should also get contact numbers of embassies and keep police informed about the couple´s travel plans after marriage.

Father Alathara said the Church would make it mandatory to announce an upcoming marriage on three Sundays in parish churches of both partners.

The new guidelines stipulate that the marriage partners should produce certificates from the priest in charge of their overseas parish about their marital status.

If such a certificate is difficult to obtain, as in the case of some Persian Gulf countries, partners should produce a status report from their employer, the guidelines state.

Father Alathara said these rules already exist but many dioceses have not followed them.

Normally, parishes conduct the betrothal ceremony on a Saturday and read out the marriage announcement for the next three consecutive Sundays. The parish priest solemnizes the marriages only after that.

However, the Church relaxed the rule to accommodate youths working overseas who come home on a short vacation.

“But hasty marriages are bound to be doomed,” says Varghese Chacko, a retired school teacher. Her son, who visited the United States, met an Indian nurse who was working there and they subsequently got married in India. But it turned out that she already had an American boyfriend, who later threatened him.

Chacko said the couple divorced soon after.

Mathew Pappan, another parent, says he wants the Church to set up a help desk to verify the background of marriage partners. “Mere guidelines will not help,” he said.